Despite already being seven or eight posts in, here it is: the belated inaugural (somewhat) post. And though you can already see a bit of where I am going with this whole thing in prior posts, I still want to use this one to write about my reasons for starting the blog and the back story behind its title and theme.
I have a love-hate relationship with stereotypes in this country, and the same goes for the underlying culture wars from which many of them emanate. I love the endless jokes, sitcoms, stand-up routines, and movies that culture-war based stereotypes have inspired over the years, but I abhor the negative impact on our nation's policies, both foreign and domestic. While goofy stereotypes and the tectonic movements in the underlying culture wars may make for good laughs, I cannot help but wonder whether the harm they inflict upon our nation's politics outweighs the good humor which they engender.
I have a similar love-hate relationship with the way I am viewed by other people in this pervasive atmosphere of stereotyping and pigeon-holing. People who first meet me by running into me on the street may believe I am surly, quiet, or even conservative because I am a square-built, 200+ lb white man often dressed (you guessed it!) like a lumberjack. Still other people who meet me at work, in a seminar, or in a discussion may think I am just the opposite because I am gregarious, somewhat loud, and unabashedly progressive. Of course neither one of these assessments would be complete or accurate on their own, and they are clearly demonstrative of the beholder's prejudices, not of any characteristics of my own. I do not in any way feel victimized or seriously harmed by this; I think it has become outright hilarious.
The fact is, however, that these two issues intersect and are indeed, inseparable. Because of the culture wars and their contrived stereotypes, people view me - and you, your family, and all of your friends - through a blurred and skewed lens. But you know what feels great?! Totally bursting stereotype bubbles. This is what I intend to do everyday on this blog.
First, I need to set the record straight. I am a 200+ lb white man often seen in a big plaid shirt. I am very liberal/progressive. But of course the story does not end there.
I may vote blue, but you will not catch me dead eating fucking tofu. Healthy?! Please. It is reconstituted soybean protein product mechanically formed via an industrial process in a factory setting. Natural foods indeed! Me, I love nothing more than savoring applewood smoked bacon or grilling my own blood-red beef steak over an open flame while drinking a beer, regardless of temperature, rain or shine. That's the way to live. And I will not apologize for taking cracks at vegetarians or saying that wheat grass and tofu are for hippies. Come on!
I could go on and on. I drive a diesel car, and I think Priuses whine at the same pitch as a lobster when you throw him live into a boiling pot of water. I wear jeans, but they will never be "skinny". I split my own firewood and spent a good deal of my childhood going fishing with my friends and raising sheep. And I do not indulge in the jeans, the plaid, the beers, or anything else "ironically". I would take the woods over Times Square any day of the week, and I would rather brave a snowstorm on a rural road once in a while than spend every day commuting through traffic. I am cultured and somewhat well traveled, but I still prefer country to city. Still, you won't ever see me voting Republican or otherwise basing my world view on my habits, my pastimes, or my personal appearance. That is for idiots.
You see, this is where the fun comes in, and this is where the blog will be going. Though this cultural background against which we are all set may pigeon-hole us as has been done to me (and I am sure you as well, perhaps with far more dire consequences), there is a great opportunity here for comedy, insight, and incisive writing. Some of it may not be PG-13, some of it may be outright rude, but it should be equal parts humorous and thought-provoking. Though I can make no guarantees here, I will do my best to derive humor from profound insight and prolonged reflection, rather than just take the easy cheap shots. Again, no promises. Really. None whatsoever.
In closing, I hope you come back often to read what goes up here. In future, posts should not always be this lengthly, though sometimes a topic will demand it. There will be a mix of culture, politics, policy, high-brow humor, and outright rude jokes. Variety is what will make it all worth a return visit, right? Anyway, thanks for reading this whole introduction, and I hope you'll come back in future.
"whine at the same pitch as a lobster when you throw him live into a boiling pot of water."
ReplyDeleteYou monster!
I get what you're saying, but between Peter Singer and David Foster Wallace, I have a hard time justifying why I still eat meat. I still DO eat meat of course, but I feel guilty about it every time.
Well come on Rais, you knew some of this would be comic writing. I actually have lobster about once or twice a year.
DeleteI have not read Peter Singer or David Foster, though I do know of Mr. Singer. The fact is, not all of us can be vegetarians. I actually would not mind being one if I could be, but you see I am in a minority of people who actually get physically ill if they do not have animal protein. My whole family is prone to hypoglycemia, and plant and other secondary proteins just don't do it. If I don't eat meat, I get shaky, cannot concentrate, can become lightheaded, and otherwise feel as though I am having a blood sugar crash, with nothing but eggs or meat doing anything but exacerbating the problem. I have only ever heard of a couple of people outside my family with the same or similar problem, but it does exist.
Still, all that seriousness aside, I love taking cracks at vegetarians and Priuses. How could you not?