Although this could not come at a more inconvenient time for me, I still accept and appreciate it. It is what makes this season unique, and it is an important feature of this little part of the world. Unfortunately, not everyone shares this feeling.
For those ignorant enough to wait for and indeed embrace global climate change as a great thing that will turn Vermont into Venezuela, Massachusetts into Miami, and Connecticut into Cancun, I have a suggestion: don't wait! Book your flights in advance, get to that great infernal weather sooner, and save some money! Below are some rates from Priceline.
That's right! Stop your complaining, stop wishing winter would disappear, and instead make yourself disappear! It is much easier to do, and indeed it is much easier on my ears.
So now that I have done you the favor of conveying this precious information, please do me a solid and stop your incessant whining. No one has hogtied you and forced you to sit through winter after winter. If you are a US citizen, you have the right to live in or at least visit damn near every biome known to humankind. I'd suggest you take advantage of that fact.
You may of course also simply ignore me. Feel free to do so. But please be advised that I will feel equally free to walk away from you unannounced, mid-conversation, the next time you subject me to your childish bellyaching. Have a great weekend!
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